Monday, February 7, 2011
A few years ago I was carefully following the directions on a package of dry split pea soup mix. The directions said it needed a few more minutes. Within those few minutes I had a kitchen full of smoke and quickly discovered that the windows in my kitchen wouldn't open! I called the management office and the meanest manager of them all picked up. It was difficult to explain to her that I needed the handy man NOW, not when he had time at the end of the work day or tomorrow, without admitting to this bitter women my pea soup mishap.
I've had a couple instanced of fabric catching fire. Once I was using a towel as a pot holder to remove a pan from the oven. The cotton towel grazed the hot oven coil and quickly caught fire. Recently, I had my black olives in salt resting on the stove with a cloth on top. I accidentally turned on the wrong burner and the whole cloth caught fire while my back was turned! I had to throw away the hand embroidered cloth and the plastic bowl that held the olives. I know I'm not supposed to leave plastic containers or towels on the range, but I guess I have to relearn my lesson once in a while.
Recently, I've had a string of glass-breaking incidences. It began in December with my beautiful glass bowl with the blue leaf. That very day I had been thinking how much I loved it, but one day it might break, and how might I feel? That evening I was doing dishes. I looked around for one of the Pyrex bowls or the measuring cup I usually use for my hot soapy water, but I only saw my favorite bowl. It happened as in slow motion... I started pouring the boiling water in the bowl... thinking it was a bad idea... but I couldn't stop myself... and then I heard... POP. I saw a thin crack crawl down the side of my beautiful bowl. Thank G-d my father was there to help me through this tough time and take care of the remains of the bowl.
A few weeks ago I had my first attempt at bulgur pilaf in a brand new pot staying warm in the oven. When I went to retrieve the dish, I found that the glass top to the pot had shattered, rendering the food inedible. The most embarrassing part is that I actually thought I could salvage a little bit of the pilaf to show my husband how good it was. He was too scared to enjoy it, and now I can't eat hot bulgur wheat without worrying about glass in my food.
And last week, I had probably the most expensive glass mishap. While I was sewing aprons, I was ironing them on a few towels on our kitchen table. I forgot that our table has glass on top and that heat and non-tempered glass don't mix. And again... POP. I managed to cover up the problem with packing tape to delay telling my husband. By the time I prepared him he wasn't so upset. But really, I should have known better.
I won't even tell you about my glass mug in the electric kettle experiment, the two times we had to evacuate the house when I was trying to make popcorn, soups gone awry, and things turned green and fuzzy before their time. Did I mention I still haven't gotten all the baking soda out of my oven? I think you've heard enough for today. Now it's your turn!
Please share some of your most memorable kitchen disasters. Maybe you can save others from dangerous and costly mistakes. Or maybe you will just give us a chuckle. If you have pictures of the damage, e-mail them to nonrecipe (at) gmail.com.